I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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