Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
