and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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