Where did you get a picture of my penis
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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