You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
