just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
