They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
