Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize