escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
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