whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
