Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
