going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
