I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
