she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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