Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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