if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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