I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize