I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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