Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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