How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
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