She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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