I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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