She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
