does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
