New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Randomize
