Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
