i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize