So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
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