Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
