Reggie can tackle my bush.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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