just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
