At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i dont even know how to be here
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
