I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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