Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
