What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
