I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
