Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Randomize
