You made me cry and you don't even care
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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