i already hear my dad disowning me
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
