i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
