We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Randomize
