He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
