Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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