you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
