I love black thongs
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize