It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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