its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize