More tranny stories later!
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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