I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
