the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
