turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
