I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
